What His Holiness the Dalai Lama Taught Me About Internet Marketing

At the recent Engage Today conference in Calgary, I had the good fortune to listen to and meet many amazing masters, including Stephen R. Covey, Sir Richard Branson, and His Holiness the Dalai Lama.

After His Holiness (HH) spoke for a while, addressing our group of about 1000 people, he asked if anyone had any questions.

HH is the only person in the world who is both head of state and head of his religion. More importantly, here was a humble, loving man who spends the first 5 hours of every day in prayerful meditation, arising at 3:30 to get clear and "sharpen the saw", as Covey would say. This is a man who thinks clearly, loves unconditionally, and is committed to:

• Compassion and forgiveness to all
• Religious tolerance
• The Tibetan cause

I knew this might be my only opportunity in life to interact directly with the great man himself... So when HH asked if anyone had questions, guess who was the first person to jump to his feet. If you know me, you already know the answer. Shy is not how my friends describe me.

 

Surrounded by entrepreneurs and college students, in a conference about business and success and contribution, it was tempting to ask a question specifically related to business. But I am all about self-improvement and my honest need was more about myself than my business. So I asked HH:

 

"I have a problem with anger. What can I do?"

My whole life, I have been known to be calm and peaceful. I remember my Italian friend's mom calling me "Tranquilo Porcupino" when I was a teenager, because I was so imperturbable (and at that time, I spiked my hair up with lots of gel and blow-drying... ah the 80's... what a great time for fashion).

Since then, I've embraced a simple personal policy: refusal to react.

I've known for a long time that you can't be productive or constructive when you allow yourself to react in anger. I strive to do everything out of a place of love, and avoid doing things for false motives or wrong reasons.

But sometimes, I boil over. Stress... pressure... whatever... the flip switches and I say things (and say them in a way) that I can't believe. They call it "getting beside yourself" for good reason. Sometimes even while I'm still in the peak of the emotion, I would see myself and be aghast at the anger I was witnessing. "How can I say such a thing? Stop, Jim! Why aren't you stopping?" Sometimes it's after the momentary lapse that I feel the full impact of remorse, shame, and regret.

HH was wonderful in his response. He said that, first of all, he too had a problem with anger.

Then he asked me if I worked out. "You keep your body healthy - exercising and eating right?" Yes, I said. Sure I do. "Anger is bad for you... unhealthy."

And he went on to talk about how much better it is to be calm and assess the situation before reacting thoughtlessly. 

I couldn't agree more.

What does this have to do with Internet marketing?

Simply this: I know that I cannot truly master marketing - or get to a place of selfless success - with anger in my heart. I cannot serve my market or my customers consistently. My job is to love. Anger, resentment, fear, self-pity and selfish unhappiness... these do not a Master Internet Marketer make.

So I am committed, during this journey, to learning how to deal with anger. So I am adding anger to my list. "Anger... you're going down!"

I know that, at the end of these 76 days, on January 1, 2010, I won't be "done". Fully cooked. Perfect in every way. I know the journey of growing and learning will continue all my life. And I love that fact.

But I am committed to destroying false fear and destructive anger enough to be able to fly at great altitudes - free from such imprisoning and immobilizing thoughts - as I learn and grow.

I cannot build successful businesses, become a world class speaker, move into a stage of selfless contribution, or make any progress toward any great endeavor, while condoning fear and anger.

Forgive myself... YES, of course! Condone these destructive emotions and let them continue... NO WAY, Jose.

Whew! Yesterday I told you how I was feeling down in the dumps. Today I'm sharing with you about my need to get a handle on anger. I fear I may be giving you "too much transparency". But I figure we might as well get it all out in the open, so we can deal with these issues. Having "exposed" them, I can now purify - and will work to do so on a daily basis. Prayer, reading, learning, discussing... this is the way. And it need not take years.

Why not start living life with courage and peace ASAP?

In this way, I will get rid of the junk - clear the land of debris - and get back to working on the foundation and continuing to build the skyscraper of true internal success.

Comments

[Anne McKinnell]

Hi Jim,
I have been following along on your 76 days and wanted to let you know that I am quite enjoying it and finding it very inspirational. Gee, it must be hard to be this honest out in the open :) but it is inspiring me to look deeper. Oddly I found the "gratitude journal" really difficult the first time and I spent time wondering why it was so hard. It is getting easier as I go along and I find myself writing things like "solitude" and "the sun". However the "ideal day" was super easy for me, it just all poured out. Isn't it strange how looking at the same thing from a different angle has an entirely different effect? Thank you for this...

Anne.

PS) I'm still working on the photo blog, but I had to move it. I didn't think it out thoroughly enough when I started.

[Anne McKinnell]

Hey, I just realized, I said "isn't it strange how looking at the same thing from a different angle has an entirely different effect?" --- just like photography!!! Hmm... interesting :)

[Jim Miotke]

Oy, I just realized today the the lengthy comment I previously submitted to you disappeared... or never really registered. Anyhooo THANK YOU for your comments! It's neat to hear how the Ideal Day came so easily to you. And YES, it's amazing how many principles of photography apply to this topic - eliminating clutter, transparency, different angles... very cool!